100 ideas

59) list ten things you would like to do every day

Thu, 11 Jan 2007 02:37:52 GMT

once again i've left a gap between entries on here and i'm really sorry. it's taken me a long time to get out of that dark spot i was in before christmas. i did this entry before christmas, but it seems very appropriate for now, being new year, as it depicts adjustments, albeit only minor ones, that i have made to my lifestyle, in order to make it more enjoyable to me.

here's the top half

and the bottom half.

and now i have to go, as i have a fairly early lecture tomorrow and i'm completely exhausted. i hope everybody had a wonderful christmas and new year.

12) make a map of all the places you went in one day.

Sat, 02 Dec 2006 23:11:06 GMT

okay, so i have been a horrible, terrible, awful person. this week i've been in what's known as a serious depressive spiral and so, despite perservering with collecting stuff on the street, i haven't updated this. i'm sorry. i'll include the concluding part of that idea in this post to make up for it.
so, my map of where i went today basically details a christmas shopping expedition pete and i made (got pretty much everything. hooray!) and then our subsequent grabbing a dvd and gravy granules (for the toad in the hole i made tonight which was yummy) and going for a coffee and a browse in waterstones.

so, on with the update:

my map of my journeys today. it's probably wrong, and definitely not to scale, but i had fun drawing it (pete helped when i got confused with directions). it's a lot longer a walk/day than it looks, and by the end of it i was absolutely exhausted so i had to have a sleep before i made dinner and a batch of chocolate truffles for while we watch a dvd and i knit tonight. i should've taken pictures of pete and i in all the locations so you could get an idea of the places, as they're all so different, but we were walking around in handknitted scarves (i made them) all day and you'd have seen our geekiness, so i didn't.

now, back to the neglected idea number 6.

what things are and where i found them.

stuff

and

things

it was really interesting collecting things, and i have to admit, as the week continued i got more selective about what i chose to put in my envelope (it was getting really full, and i was getting more adept at actually finding the good stuff). i got to thinking about how cool it would be to make one of those accordion envelope books big enough for a month and do this for that long, just as another diversion, or something. maybe i could build up a years worth of stuff. that would be cool. but then, if i did all the ideas i had for creative projects, i don't think i'd have time to get my degree or ever see any people, you know?
anyway, i'm off to cosy up to pete and watch a film and do some knitting.

6) glue an envelope in your journal. for one week collect items you find in the street.

Fri, 24 Nov 2006 02:24:42 GMT

i'm so tired, so i'm sorry i won't be very articulate tonight. i began this idea today, and shall be doing it for 7 days. i'm going home this weekend so i don't know that i'll be able to update very much but i will try to do periodic updates. \
i enjoyed doing this today. really looking at what was on the floor. made me sad about litter though.

all the things i found

the envelope itself plus descriptions of what i found and where today.

5) find a piece of poetry you respond to. rewrite it and glue it into your journal.

Thu, 23 Nov 2006 02:11:49 GMT

so, here is the idea i did today. it's turning out that i'm following the list in as near numerical order as i can get. i kind of like that.
a little bit of contextual information about why i selected the poem i did:
tonight i had a tea party, with probably the only person i've really connected with down here. we had an amazing time just talking and drinking tea and eating cake, talking about music, books, poetry, friends, life, family, university, everything. i feel so glad that i've got a friend down here. it makes me feel so much more hopeful for my future at university, which is good, as my situation now is not the best. but yes, she recommended this poem to me tonight, and when i looked at it, it seemd so appropriate to my finally realizing the value of hope:

i kinda forgot to write emily dickinson's name under the poem. i've corrected that now.

her words on tonight were:

Thankyou for tonight, was perfect

i don't think i could have put it better myself.

4) draw your dinner

Tue, 21 Nov 2006 23:03:15 GMT

so i've only just had the chance to update now. i wanted to colour this in but i'd have been late for my radio show. still, i think i kind of like the simplicity of it. it looks a bit like outlines.
i drew my lunch, rather than my dinner, as i've only just eaten dinner now (consisted of potato wedges and dip. i was too tired to cook properly) i only really learned one lesson from this exercise, and that is that:

lunch was really nice today. i sat with my friend tallie in the portland building, which is the architectural building, and we just talked about art, and books, and things that make me happy. we're having a tea party tomorrow.
also, there was an architectural exhibit with tiny buildings in glass cases, and i was so tempted to try and steal a mini tree. they were so cool.
i'm tired, sorry for the lacklustre update.

3) buy something inexpensive as a symbol for your need to create. use it everyday.

Tue, 21 Nov 2006 01:55:32 GMT

so i bought my teacup. i think it's gorgeous.
i had such a nice walk to go get it as well. gunwharf quays, the shopping centre round here, is adjacent to the harbour, so i stopped there for a minute, clutching the railings and watching the sun set and the boats sail. it was wonderful.

i resisted the urge to use it while i was writing notes on critical literary theory for uni today, because i'm trying to instil a sort of pavlovian instinct in myself, in that i'll use this teacup when i'm doing something creative, like writing, knitting, cooking, or drawing, and i will use a 'chalkboard mug' that i have, which you can write things on, for my uni work. it's practical, because i tend to drink coffee when working, and i can write things that will motivate me and keep my spirits up on it, as despite the fact i think my work is very interesting, it does get a bit diheartening if you spend a whole night working on an essay because you procrastinated, no? so yes, my idea of the pavlovian nature is that if i use these mugs for these seperate enough occasions i will train myself into getting into the right frame of mind to actually do them a lot quicker by association with the mugs. crazy? maybe. but let's try it regardless.

so here is my cup. my creative cup. which also has a saucer. pretty, no? how could one drink out of that and not feel suitably inspired when it's so niceley patterned and cheery, i ask?

and just for reference, here's the mug i was talking about. you can tell i've put a lot of thought into this question of what to drink out of and when, can't you? (and also, currently, the mug says 'don't let the wicked city get you down'. y'know, from the bell jar? i was using it while drafting a presentation this evening)

so anyway, i saved my teacup for after i'd done all my work, so i could have some time to sit down and be quiet and think and write. and i've had a nightmare day, but just putting aside time for myself this evening has made me think about the positives rather than the negatives. i thought, even though the idea was just to buy/use the teacup, you guys might want to see what came out of me just relaxing and thinking and drinking my hot chai latte:

-i'm grateful to be able to be here, learning. today, just one day's worth of lectures, we covered so many authors it makes my head spin. here's the ones i can remember: foucalt, stephen greenblatt, mary wollstonecraft, virginia woolf, anna jameson, jonathan swift. i could never cover that much, and learn so many new things, reading in my spare time. and it's all so interesting, even if it is hard work sometimes.

-i'm grateful to live in quite a pretty city, where there are nice places to take walks, plenty of places to sit and watch people or get lost in thought, and i don't really ever get bored.

-i'm glad for my parents having raised me so that i can look after myself. i've eaten so well since i got here, i've looked after myself properly, and managed my money. i have my parents to thank for this.

...yes, also, keri smith emailed me, if you can believe it. i left a comment on her blog asking her if it was ok to create this journal to do the 100 ideas on, and saying she inspired me, and she replied with:

hi kirsty,
this is so great!!!! thank you so much for sharing it with me. of
course you have my permission. someday i would like to set up a site
that profiles people doing the 100 ideas, (myself included).
keep it up! you're inspiring me now.
creatively yours,
keri

also, i just got this, now:

p.s. i think you're going to like my new book. it's on a somewhat
similar theme. i'll write more about it soon on the site.
k

2) write a letter to yourself in the future

Sun, 19 Nov 2006 20:44:15 GMT

so this is where i started. i would have done it in complete numerical order but it's pouring down with rain and anyway, i feel better about not working too rigidly with a structure.

i guess i just ended up giving myself advice to stand firm and get through this academic year. i sort of have the belief i can do it, i just sometimes need to focus on the long term rather than the short term. oh, who am i kidding? i can never focus on the long term, this is why this letter struck me as such an important thing to do. sort of a 'big picture' thing. it was a good way to give myself advice, advice that probably no one else would give me, or that i wouldn't listen to from other people. and to set out where i want to be in the future, even if it's not so distant.

in case you can't read it, this is what it says:

dear k,
they always tell me someday you'll look back on this and laugh. i'm not sure who i mean by 'they' but i hear it a lot. while i don't think you'll ever be able to look back on this stage of your life and find it hilarious, what i do hope is that you'll be able to look back without your heart breaking like it is now. i hope something good happens to you between now and then to dull the memory, because unless you're still experiencing the pain, you shouldn't be able to recall it very well.
i've been clinging to small things to keep me happy of late. it's difficult to explain how they make me look forward, to your time, but they do. suddenly i'm interested in cooking, homeware, pretty much anything that keeps my mind off the here and now. i cling to the hope that you found a few good friends to live with (maybe t, she seems a lot like people you've gotten on with in the past?) and you've got a nice kitchen to potter around in. maybe you're growing herbs in it? i hope you're still with pete, too. he might not fully understand your ups and downs (who can? you're so volatile.) but oh, god, he tries. and he makes you happy. he likes the same things as you, and he loves you so much. if you know what's good for you you'll stick with him and be happy.
just keep studying, cooking and cleaning. stay who you are. you don't need to go out all the time to be a valid person, or even a fun one. do what you like, or you'll end up miserable. live your own life, and don't forget to keep yourself happy. try to stop letting others dictate your decisions, as if they want to do that, they don't want you to be happy in your own right, so their opinions don't matter.
oh, and get a fucking haircut.

love k.